Holiday Rant 2008

This past year, I turned to the Builder and said “I know it’s only Veteran’s Day, but I’m already sick of Christmas!”

This year, Santa put in his first appearance before the Automnal Equinox.  Besides wondering if he was hot under all that fur, I wondered if the Jolly One knew that it wasn’t even Rosh Hashanah yet.

There are two possible explanations.  One: everything starts earlier.  This past election cycle started almost two years before we could cast a vote.  Why should Christmas be any different?

Two: Auntie Mame syndrome.  For those of you who never saw Mame, there’s one scene where Mame, who lost all her money in the Great Depression, has just been fired from her job as a salesgirl.  This coincides with her nephew coming home from school for Thanksgiving vacation.  Since both of them are so miserable, they decide to cheer themselves up by exchanging their Christmas presents a month early.  Similarly, we too are in a financial slump.  The bottom fell out of real estate, oil prices are dropping after major artificial inflation, the stock market is, falling, and a half-million jobs have been cut in the last few months.  Retailers hope to revive their flagging sales by reminding people “Hey!  It’s Christmas!  Peace on earth, goodwill to men, overpriced swag to your friends, and maybe we can have a black Christmas!”  Unfortunately, it didn’t work.  People started baking cookies and knitting sweaters as gifts.  Sales rose, but only slightly.  Even Santa couldn’t revive the economy.  Mybe he didn’t want to.  Maybe eight years under President Bush put us perpetually on the “naughty list”.

May the new year and the new administration bring us better tidings.  And, to everyone out there, I hope you had a merry Christmas, a happy Hanukkah, a divine Solstice, or just a nice day off work.

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Published in: on December 25, 2008 at 9:37 pm  Leave a Comment  

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