Gay marriage–Why cry about it?

So, New York is considering legalizing gay marriage.  New Hampshire already has.  And people are all kinds of upset.


As I see it, if two men (or two women) decide to marry each other, it won’t affect my life one bit.  It’s not like it will undo my marriage.  Besides, why deny a percentage of the population their civil rights?  You see, with marriage comes rights of inheritance, power of attorney, rights over mutually adopted children, and the ability to put the other on health insurance policies.  And please don’t drag out the “immorality” line.  Not even fifty years ago, certain states decreed it “immoral” and hence illegal for two people to get married if one’s skin happened to be a few shades darker than the other’s.  See Loving v. Virginia if you don’t believe me

That’s my political view.  However, from a halachic standpoint, it is wrong for two men (and some say, two women) to engage in an act of sexual intimacy.  It’s very much forbidden by the Torah.  SO, I can’t argue with that.  In fact, I would not go to a rabbi for any halachic questions if I knew that he had officiated at such a wedding.

So, i guess it’s a complicated issue for me.  However, I do support gays getting their legal rights with my vote.  And in the end, I guess that’s all that counts.

Published in: on June 3, 2009 at 6:22 pm  Comments (9)  

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9 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Nicely put. Do you have a hard time balancing Orthodox Judaism and issues such as these?

    • Yes. See my entry on kol isha (laws against women singing in public.)

  2. So, if you know they are engaging in something immoral, are you not duty bound to protect them from the error of their ways?
    Unless of course the Torah does not apply to your social responsibility of how it is you wish to be governed.
    How do you reconcile casting a vote aganist Gods law and your adherence to the same law?

    • I don’t legislate morality for non-Jews. That’s not how it works. Please read the entire entry carefully, noting the section on “civil rights”.
      Also, you seem like a nice guy, albeit conservative. As you can see, I am not. I’m sure you can find many blogs to hang out on that share your views.

  3. I don’t legislate morality for non-Jews anyone else.

    Fixed it for you. 🙂

    I agree with the civil rights bit. It’s only a matter of time, now, until gays will be allowed to marry everywhere.

  4. Daryl,
    I think she meant what she said. Non-Jews/Infidels/Gentiles. Its one and the same thing.
    It is what it is. It does not offend me. I am not what I am not. If others refer to outsiders by certain names, it should not bother me, as long as it does not affect my freedom to self determination.

    I like this little blog. Its a window into another world. And Blogs are good for exposing one into other ways of life that may not be easy to come by.

    I am not seeking folks that “share my views” neither am I here to “convert” anyone. I am here to talk to others.

    Now back to this marriege thing, Is Sodomy really a civil right? And can it really be defined as “marriege”?

  5. And please don’t drag out the “immorality” line. Not even fifty years ago, certain states decreed it “immoral” and hence illegal for two people to get married if one’s skin happened to be a few shades darker than the other’s.

    Can you possibly draw a moral equivalance between Sodomy and Race, and claim to have a good understanding of Natural law? Exactly how is sexual orientation equal to race or gender?

    I do not wish to be hostile to your views. I just need you to articulate better why, it is alright for you to vehemently abide by a code of conduct that you do not wish to be governed by given the opportunity.

    • Please read the entire post carefully. With marriage comes many civil rights, such as inheritance, power of attorney, etc. These are the civil rights I think are worth protecting.
      Also, this is not a Torah-based theocracy. If it were, my thinking would be different.

  6. You presume that the folks that choose this lifestyle are denied their “civil rights”.. that is not the case.

    If they are married to persons of the opposite sex, they still have all the protection of the law.

    At issue here in my opinion is not civil rights, but what it is we call marriege.

    They can even today for the most part adopt children, raise them etc… through civil unions that are legal virtually everywhere in the US. So your civil right contention is mute…
    You have not made a convincing case as to why ones sexual orientation is a protected civil right under the constitution. You are simply making an assertion without and tangible evidence to estamblish why suddenly bedroom manners are a protected class under our constitution.

    At issue is a demand that equates ones sexual preferences and fetishes to race, heritage or gender. Redifining marriege is more than just a question of what people do in the privacy of their dwellings..

    it will have serious repucultions for thing like mormon hospitals or schools and what can be and cannot be tought in those places. what will happen when a happily married gay couple go to a mosque social service center and demand that they be treated the same way as any other person, becouse its the law of the land?

    What about the constitutionally guaranteed religious freedoms. Should for example the Catholic church shut down Catholic adoption services becouse its nuns will not serve gay folks? Should a conservative jewish center be allowed to set a code of conduct within its walls that does not violate this “civil right”?

    You assume too much when you claim it will in no way affect your little tradational world…

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